That's My Desk!
by kidanalyse
Summary: Shizuo comes to university one day to find that an idiot boy has decided to sit in the chair that had been his for the last two months. Needless to say, this doesn't bode well with Shizuo...or his short temper. Shizaya. College AU. Inspired by a random tumblr post I can't be bothered to find.
1. Chapter 1

Shizuo was pissed. Why the _fuck_ he had decided to take the eight am class was beyond him. But, it was the only one that was available other than one at seven pm, and that's when he was supposed to be working at the fucking convenience store.

But damn, was it _really_ worth it to have to get up so early?

It might also be worth mentioning that this was Shizuo's second month in the class. Yes, his second month. And he was still complaining about the time. Some things never change.

But, Shizuo did have one thing that always seemed to salvage his morning: he always got the window desk, the one that ensured that you could relax with sunlight spilling on you, or sit alert as a lecture played out in front of you. It was perfect.

Sure, it made Shizuo feel like some kind of anime protagonist, but he loved it, and it had taken him a damn lot of work during the first week to secure it. He'd had to establish his reputation very quickly, using various threats and punches in order to convey to all the students that that desk was _his_ and everyone else should _back the fuck off._

And everyone listened to him. Out of fear, probably, but they still listened. So Shizuo was happy.

He made his way towards that very desk right now, not really looking where he was going as he was answering a text. He dropped his bag roughly on the floor next to his desk without looking up from his phone.

 _Where's the damn L letter…_

Shizuo grasped the back of his chair and pulled it out, pocketing his phone when—

"Oomph!"

Shizuo leaped back, dropping his phone in the process. Something heavy had just dropped! Look around wildly first, it took Shizuo about half a second to realize that no, idiot, nothing was dropping from the ceiling. So he finally looked downwards, at his desk, to see a crumple of black hair and clothes sitting where his chair should be.

"What the fuck—" Shizuo started, but before he could say anything else, the person—it was a boy, now that Shizuo could see his face—had stood up, pulled the chair back to himself, and sat down again. This ignited a fire within Shizuo. Who the fuck _was_ this person, taking his desk?!

"That was very rude, Nobody-kun," The boy said, brushing his pants off daintily and glaring at Shizuo. Shizuo noticed that he was wearing black skinny jeans… Was he goth or something? His eyes even had a reddish tint to them.

But, whatever. Shizuo wanted to fight this person, not speculate on whether they were goth or not. So he shoved his face into the other's and snarled, " _I'm_ being rude?! That's my chair you're sitting in!"

The boy looked extremely uninterested, even yawning slightly. "I think you'll find that you're mistaken…" He craned his neck to look at Shizuo's backpack, which had his name stitched into the side, "…Shizu-chan. In college, we don't have assigned seats!"

Shizuo could feel his quick temper getting the better of him, but this guy was really pissing him off! Didn't he know that this was Shizuo's seat; had been for two months?!

"I know that!" Shizuo hissed, reaching a hand up to snag the asshole's collar. "But I've been sitting here since the start of the semester! It's my fucking desk."

Izaya sighed, a haughty, exasperated, I-don't-have-time-for-this sigh that made Shizuo's blood boil. How dare this little—this little _flea_ treat him like a fucking inconvenience when _he_ was the one inconveniencing _Shizuo?!_

"Shizu-chan—" He started, but Shizuo cut him off with a threatening growl.

"Do _not_ call me that."

The boy raised an eyebrow, a smirk breaking out on his features. It made him look like Satan, if Shizuo was to be honest.

" _Shizu-chan,"_ He said more forcefully, almost purring the name. Shizuo's skin prickled. "Once again, I'll remind you that colleges don't have assigned seats! Whoever gets here first gets the seat. You were just too slow~"

Shizuo's self control snapped. Raising his fist, he growled, "You little fucking flea—"

"Heiwajima-kun!"

Shizuo froze just before his fist connected with the flea's (fucking _still smirking_ ) face. He looked up, quickly realizing that the teacher and the majority of the class was staring at him. Feeling his face heat up, Shizuo released the boy and turned towards the teacher.

"S…Sorry," He muttered, casting his eyes downwards. The teacher glared at him disapprovingly.

"Please take your _seat,_ Heiwajima-kun," She said menacingly, nodding towards a desk in the back of the room. Shizuo gaped at her in disbelief for a moment before violently snatching up his bag and stalking to the back seat, fuming the whole way. He sat down roughly and kept his eyes glued to the desk, trying to ignore the breathy sound from the window seat that sounded suspiciously like a laugh.

He was going to _get_ that bastard if it was the last thing he did. Nobody took his seats and got away with it.

.

Shizuo learned during role call that the boy that he had just taken to calling 'flea' was actually named Izaya—Izaya Orihara. The name suited him, Shizuo thought. It was very sharp and pointy sounding, and Izaya seemed like a very sharp and pointy kind of person.

Try as he might to concentrate on the lecture going on in front of him, Shizuo found his eyes repeatedly wandering longingly back to his lost seat, where Izaya sat diligently taking notes.

 _Ugh._ Shizuo thought. _He's the studious type._

Lazily tracing Izaya's form with his eyes, Shizuo wondered where he had come from. He surely hadn't been here for the first two months; Shizuo was positive he would've noticed him. He had a commanding presence about him—one that said "look at me, but stay away." Shizuo would've noticed his aura.

Chewing on his pencil tip, Shizuo thought that this stuff didn't really matter anyway. He just wanted to give Izaya a stern warning—to _not_ sit in his seat anymore, thank you—and be rid of the flea as soon as possible. Something about Izaya irked him…He wasn't sure what. Maybe their personalities just weren't compatible.

Shizuo was suddenly jerked out of his stupor as students around him began rising from their seats. Sitting up and looking around, Shizuo realized that class must, in fact, be over. Blinking in mild confusion, Shizuo gathered his things and stood, locking his sights on Izaya, who was also packing up. He made a beeline right for the raven.

Before Shizuo had even done anything to get Izaya's attention, Izaya sighed and, without turning to look behind him, said, "Shizu-chan, now really, do you actually want to start trouble for me on my first day?"

He turned around, slinging his bag over his shoulder and offering Shizuo his best piteous look. Shizuo wasn't buying it.

"Yeah, I do," He said, taking a step closer. "Because you started trouble for me on my sixtieth day."

"Sixty-second day!" Izaya corrected, grinning. "Term started sixty-two days ago, not sixty."

Shizuo's eyes sparked rage again, and he sneered. "Shut the fuck up, flea." He lunged at Izaya…

…And was met with air. Shizuo's arms had encircled nothing but air. Frantically straightening himself, Shizuo whipped his head around to see Izaya _behind_ him. He gaped. No one had evaded a punch from him before.

"Ah-ah-ah!" Izaya sing-songed from his place behind Shizuo. "A bit too slow there. Maybe next time!"

 _That_ really irked Shizuo. Roaring with fury, he lunged again and missed _again;_ his arms flung through air as Izaya jumped, laughing, to the side, nearer to the door.

"Catch me if you can, Shizu-chan!" He said, his eyes alight with excitement. He then bolted out the door, cackling the whole way. Shizuo didn't need to be told twice, and immediately took off after him.

And so began the infamous Shizuo-Izaya rivalry of Tokyo University. Or, as some were more prone to call it…Shizaya.

 **A/N: Hello, Shizaya community! My name is Kida. Nice to meet you. Yeah, if you look at my previous stories, this one's a bit different but...Oh well. I've grown and matured. It's Shizaya time. Maybe? That's actually up to you guys! I'll probably upload a second chapter regardless, but if you'd like me to continue this, I'd appreciate it if you would leave me a review, or maybe even follow the story. The number of those I get will decide if/when I update! So yeah. Thanks for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

Izaya skipped merrily towards the library, swinging his bag back and forth as he went. It had been about a month since that faithful day when he had unknowingly—yes, _unknowingly;_ he was still new then and hadn't known who to mess with—sat in a very violent blonde's chair. It had been a month since he and his beloved Shizu-chan had become renowned campus enemies.

And it had been a month since Izaya had been utterly bored out of his mind.

Yes, Izaya thought, smiling jovially, Shizu-chan was _very_ entertaining. Izaya loved him. He regarded Shizuo almost as a toy, a plaything, someone that was made solely for Izaya's amusement. And amuse Izaya he did, in more ways than one.

First off, Izaya had come to the conclusion during their third—chase? Fight? Izaya didn't know what to call whatever they did, to be honest— _thing_ that Shizuo was a closeted homosexual. Or a closeted bisexual. Maybe pansexual, if the brute even knew what that was.

Either way, Izaya was pretty sure that Shizuo was attracted to men. He thought this because, during that third whatever, when Shizuo had unfortunately backed him into an ally and slammed him into the wall, Izaya had offered him a smirk and a sly, "Mmmm, alright Shizu-chan, if you _really_ want to fuck me against the wall, I can't say I'd be totally adverse to the idea—"

And what had Shizuo done? Shizuo had turned bright red, immediately released Izaya (" _You fucking FLEA, that is NOT what I was doing!"_ ), and high-tailed it the fuck out of there. Izaya had stood there in slight shock for about thirty seconds before bursting into mirthful laughter. _This is great,_ He had thought, stuffing his hands in his pockets and grinning after Shizuo's retreating form. _Now I know what really bothers him._

So, ever since then, Izaya had been sure to include as _much_ innuendo and dirty humor as possible in his conversations with Shizuo. Izaya could tell that this was getting on Shizuo's nerves—and, to a lesser degree, his _hormones—_ but that just made him want to do it all the more.

Ah, how he loved playing with sexually frustrated people! They were simply the most entertaining type of humans imaginable. And Izaya did a pretty good job of riling them up, if he did say so himself. He had always been told he could be a model, after all.

Humming a little, Izaya continued towards the library, looking forward to his soon-to-be encounter with Shizu-chan. Yes, Izaya had basically memorized Shizuo's entire schedule, and it was truly a testament to how utterly stupid Shizuo was that he hadn't bothered to change any of his daily activities in order to avoid Izaya, such as the times he went to the library. Or he secretly liked Izaya's company. Either one was okay with Izaya as long as he got to see Shizuo at least once a day.

He finally approached the library building—a very modern place, entirely made out of glass—and stepped towards the stairs, taking them two at a time. He sang a breathy, "Shizu-chan, Shizu-chaan~" under his breath the entire time, reaching the door and pulling it open.

Izaya strode inside, taking his cellphone out and muting it before beginning his search for Shizuo. One thing Shizuo _did_ do that Izaya had to give him credit for was switching up where he sat every time he went here. You would never find him in the same chair, even if he was in the same building.

Izaya found it kind of ironic, considering he had first met Shizuo because he had accidentally sat in the chair Shizuo always sat in. Now he didn't even sit in the same _area_ two days in a row.

Continuing his walk through the library, Izaya decided that he should probably check the study rooms first. Izaya and Shizuo unfortunately shared just one class together, and that one class happened to be History. It also happened to have a test scheduled for the very next day.

Now, Izaya wasn't worried about this test at all. History was his best subject, because he simply _loved_ learning about all the things humans had done and why they had done them. It was fun to him. So, he had decided to take the night before the test off and go harass Shizuo as he tried to study.

Because Izaya knew that Shizu-chan was definitely not as good at History as he was. And oh, how he loved to mock him for it.

Finally reaching the study rooms, Izaya's face split into a wide grin as he saw the familiar bleached-blonde hair of his lovely plaything. Feeling his mood improving just by looking at Shizuo, Izaya skipped forwards and pulled at the glass door, thanking his stars that not only was Shizuo here, but he was also _alone._

"Shiiiizu-chan~!" He called loudly, walking over to where Shizuo sat and plopping down in the chair next to him. "How are you?"

Shizuo, who had jumped about a mile in the air when Izaya entered, now looked as if he was trying extremely hard to not jump up and strangle the raven right then. Izaya knew it was probably because they were in someplace so public, and for that he was both disappointed and grateful.

"Izaya-kun, get the fuck out of here," Shizuo said instead, his voice filled with barely controlled rage. It seemed even the _sight_ of Izaya set him off, which made Izaya himself absolutely gleeful.

"I'd fuck _you_ out of here," Izaya purred in reply, leaning close and batting his eyelashes for affect. Predictably, Shizuo's face blossomed into a blush and he jerked backwards as far from Izaya as he could go.

Laughing, Izaya leaned back against the desk and threw his trademark smirk at Shizuo.

"So, whatcha studying?" Izaya asked, beginning to rifle through the many books and papers spread out over Shizuo's desk.

"None of your _business,"_ Shizuo growled, catching Izaya's wrist and violently jerking it away from his papers. Izaya let out a hiss of pain and held his wrist close, glaring at Shizuo.

"That wasn't very nice, Shizu-chan," He said indignantly, cradling his hand. "I was only curious."

"I don't care," Shizuo replied, slowly sulking back to his seat and swatting Izaya away. As if he was a _fly._

This did not bode well with Izaya. So, he decided to turn up his annoyance factor _just_ a little bit.

"Shhhhiiizu-chaaaan," He whined, using the voice he had come to know that Shizuo absolutely _loathed._ Predictably, Shizuo's eyes twitched, and his grip on the desk tightened.

" _What,_ flea?" He growled, not even bothering to look in Izaya's direction. Izaya thought that that was probably because if he so much as glanced that way, he wouldn't be able to control his temper. Delightful, wasn't it?

"I'm bored," Izaya replied, heaving an exasperated sigh and resting his chin on Shizuo's hand. Shizuo cringed and jerked his hand away. Izaya realized, too late, that Shizuo's hand was shaking with anger. Maybe he had found another thing that pissed Shizuo off—boredom.

A moment later, when Izaya's back was stinging from the impact of crashing into and breaking a glass window, he knew that his assumption had been correct.

Oops. He hadn't planned to be thrown anywhere today.

Apparently, however, this plan had not been one-sided. The moment Izaya's body had connected with the window, Shizuo had shouted, "Oh _fuck!"_ and rushed forwards to assess the damage. Izaya was too dazed and half-conscious to remember much else, but he could vaguely recall a lot of shouting, scolding, and overall panic.

He distantly thought that it was too bad he was about to black out. He loved seeing panic.

And then everything went dark.

.

Izaya woke up three hours later in the nurse's office. Everything felt kind of stuffy, and his body felt like it was burning. Izaya did a quick once-over of his health condition and came to the conclusion that:

1\. No permanent damage had been done.

2\. The burning sensations were probably from the scratches he had gotten from the falling glass. He wondered if he was bleeding.

And 3. There was someone touching his arm.

Jerking his head to the right, Izaya blinked in surprise as he was met with a pair of sunglasses and bleach blonde hair. His surprise didn't last long, however, before his face was back into it's trademark smirk. It was slightly more bitter this time, though.

"Aww, Shizu-chan, so nice of you to come here," Izaya said dryly, looking pointedly at the hand that was wrapped around his wrist. Shizuo blinked, seemingly just now realizing that he was awake, and released his arm.

"Shut up," Shizuo muttered, his eyes glittering with hatred. At least, that's what it looked like to Izaya. "I'm not here because I want to be. I was—"

"Given a new partner."

Both Shizuo and Izaya looked up at the interrupting voice. The Headmistress of the school had entered, smiling grimly.

"Hello, Orihara-kun. Heiwajima-kun," She acknowledged, inclining her head slightly. Izaya and Shizuo did the same, Shizuo ashamedly, and Izaya bemusedly.

"Good evening, Akiyama-sensei," Izaya said politely, flashing a smile too friendly to be real. Akiyama knew this too, but ignored it.

"Good evening. Are you well?"

Izaya nodded. "Better."

"Good."

Akiyama crossed the room and stood at the edge of Izaya's bed, smiling at the both of them. For some reason, Izaya felt a sense of foreboding. Maybe because Shizuo wasn't looking at either of them.

"As Heiwajima-kun was undoubtedly about to tell you… Yes, he is not here of his own free will. We're sorry to say," She added, throwing a sharp look at Shizuo. Shizuo squirmed uncomfortably. Izaya decided right then that he quite liked Akiyama-sensei.

Focusing back on Izaya, Akiyama continued, "It should come as no surprise that Heiwajima-kun has quite the record of on-campus fighting. Ever since _you_ came here, Orihara-kun, this fighting has increased."

Izaya grinned and felt a burst of pride, mentally patting himself on the back. Well done.

"We told him about a week ago that if he got into another fight—it didn't matter with whom—that he would be expelled."

Izaya's grin slipped from his face like a bare foot on ice. What?! He couldn't have Shizuo expelled. Shizuo was his only form of entertainment nowadays! What would he do without him?

His worry must have shown on his face, because Akiyama looked mildly miffed. "No need to look so aghast, Orihara-kun," She said bemusedly. Izaya quickly wiped his face clean of emotion. That was a bad slip there; better not do it again.

"We've given Heiwajima-kun a choice, and we'll do the same to you, since you are undeniably part of this whole problem," Akiyama continued, her eyes sharp behind her glasses. Izaya was intrigued. He loved deals, but what sort of deals could the Headmistress possibly offer him?

He listened intently to Akiyama-sensei's next words.

"This is your choice: You two are to become 'college buddies'—or, you are not to leave the other's side during meals, classes, free time, etcetera, until you have resolved all negative energy between you. You are not to lay a _hand_ on each other in violence during this time. You will get along and you will do so willingly." Here she paused and smiled. "Or you will be expelled."

She crossed over and laid a hand on Shizuo's shoulder. Shizuo looked beyond trapped and embarrassed. "Heiwajima-kun has already made his choice. He says he is willing to try this partnership with you, in order to escape expulsion." She nudged Shizuo slightly, who looked up and glared at Izaya for a moment before muttering, "Yeah, I did."

Akiyama smiled. "See? Your agreement is all we need to put this in place, Orihara-kun. Are you up for it?"

Before Akiyama had even finished her sentence, Izaya was nodded, excitement glittering in his eyes. This was quite possibly the best thing he could have been offered. It wasn't even a _deal;_ it was more like a present to him!

Shooting a grin at Shizuo, Izaya bowed gracefully (he wasn't sure how he had managed graceful when he was sitting on a hospital bed) to Akiyama and said, "Oh, I think I can do that. I'd rather not get expelled, either."

 **A/N: Cool! I got reviews. I got 2, to be exact. I think 2 is a nice number. So, I'll announce it right now: When I get 2 reviews/follows/favorites (not two of each, two IN ALL), I update! I'm sorry if this seems like a lot to ask for, but...I need to know that people are actually** ** _reading_** **the story, you know? Otherwise there's no point in updating. So yeah, if you like this story, please review or follow it! That'll make me update. :D I so love writing this relationship... I can't wait to write them living together. :) I also have this personal headcanon that Shizuo is a lot quieter around authority figures that he actually respects, so that'll probably show up a lot here, as it just did with Akiyama-sensei! ^^**

 **Thanks for reading!**


	3. Chapter 3

Izaya was released two hours later that same day with a prescription for pain killers and instructions to put some weird Neosporin-like ointment on his back to take care of the scratches from the glass. Shizuo only knew these exact details because he had been forced to stay with Izaya for _the entire time._

Needless to say, Shizuo was not in the best of moods.

"We even have to fucking _live_ together," He hissed as he and Izaya made their way out of the nurse's. "This is fucking bullshit; they think the solution to us fighting all the time is to shove us together and _force_ us to get along?! Ugh!"

"Aw, come on, Shizu-chan, it won't be so bad," Izaya chimed in, leaning over and smirking at Shizuo. "I've always wanted a pet!"

Shizuo caught himself _just_ as his fist was about to connect with Izaya's nose. Right, he couldn't hit the flea unless he wanted to be expelled. Whoop de-fucking-doo.

Really, Shizuo couldn't afford to be expelled. His parents had already shelled out a lot of money in order to get him here—Shizuo didn't even want to _think_ about that—and he wasn't too keen on enduring their wrath if he was to be kicked out.

It would also be a personal blow too. Not that Shizuo didn't already have enough of those.

So, with great self control, Shizuo lowered his hand and instead sent Izaya a glare that would have made a world renowned wrestler cower.

Of course, Izaya Orihara was not a world renowned wrestler, so all Shizuo got in return was a winning (fake) smile and a wink.

Turning forward, Shizuo muttered, "I hate you."

"I hate you too, Shizu-chan!" Izaya replied, and on him it sounded like an endearing phrase used ironically by lovers. Shizuo didn't like it.

"Here," He said, suddenly remembering something and pulling a piece of paper out of his pocket. He shoved it into Izaya's hands. "That's our dorm room number. I don't know where the fuck Building C is, and you seem to know pretty much everything, so lead the way."

"Thanks for the indirect compliment," Izaya said, humming at Shizuo's murderous glare and inspecting the paper. "Ahh, yes, I know where this is! They were really generous; this room has two beds."

Shizuo stopped short. "Of course it does! Why wouldn't it?!"

Izaya shrugged, holding the paper up to the light. "I thought maybe they'd make us share a bed, since they're so bent on us getting along. That'd be a real test: see if we still don't kill each other even if we're sharing a bed."

Shizuo knew he was blushing and he hated it. "I don't think even they are that desperate, flea. They want us to get along, not start _dating."_

Izaya shrugged, and the two continued the walk to Building C with minimal conversation. It struck Shizuo that he was willingly trusting Izaya to lead him somewhere; how did he know that the flea wasn't taking him to some dangerous alleyway to kill him? Shizuo stood straighter and took in his surroundings; no, it looked normal….Just like any campus would…

"You can stop looking like a frightened cat, Shizu-chan," Izaya interrupted his thoughts, causing Shizuo to jump a little. "I wouldn't do anything to you around here; it'd be too easily traceable to me."

Shizuo grumbled something incomprehensible and sulked, lowering his guard just a bit. Izaya was right; he wasn't that stupid. So they continued their walk in peace, finally arriving to Building C, apartment 413, five minutes later.

"Heeeere we are~" Izaya crooned, skipping forward to the door. He then stopped and turned to look expectantly at Shizuo.

Shizuo stared back, nonplussed.

Izaya looked exasperated. Rude. "We kind of need a _key?"_

"Ohhh—r-right," Shizuo said stupidly, rummaging around in his pockets and producing a silver key a moment later. Instead of giving it to Izaya's outstretched hand, however, he strode forward and unlocked the door himself, just to annoy him. Izaya did look a bit nettled when he entered, but that vanished the moment he took in the room.

It wasn't a bad room, if Shizuo was to be honest. The living room was a good size, and it was already stocked with sturdy and stylish furniture. There was even a TV! Stepping in a bit more, Shizuo peered through the small dorm. Of course it had a kitchen; all the dorms did…Two bedrooms…And one bathroom.

Hmm. One bathroom. Would that cause problems? Shizuo sneaked a glance at Izaya, who was also looking at the bathroom and frowning slightly. Shizuo hoped that the flea didn't have a long morning beauty routine, but everything he knew about Izaya said otherwise.

Groaning and not looking forward to the next day, Shizuo stomped towards the small hallway that had two doors staring across at each other. Their bedrooms.

"Which room do you want, flea?" Shizuo asked, gesturing vaguely to both rooms. Izaya stopped looking distastefully at the bathroom to sulk over to Shizuo and examine the rooms.

"It's nice of you to give me a choice," he said absently, taking a step inside one of the rooms and surveying it. Shizuo ignored him.

"I'll have this one," Izaya said in regards to the room he was currently standing in. "It has a window, and since I figure beasts don't need sunlight, you should be fine without one."

Shizuo's lips curled in annoyance, and his hands twitched with longing to wrap them around the insufferable flea's neck. As it was, though, he still had the threat of expulsion, so he kept his hands to himself.

"Fine," Shizuo said, stalking into the other room. "Then this one's mine."

With that, Shizuo slammed the door in Izaya's face, and the two didn't speak for the rest of the night.

 **A/N: Yeaaah, not much happened in this chapter, did it? I'm sorry! It had to be done though; I had to set the scene for them living together, and I considered combining this chapter and the next one (of them actually doing things together), but then it got too long in my opinion. So you have...this. But, oh well! Like I said, it had to be done. I promise you that the next chapter will have some Shizaya action though, and I'll hopefully get it out more quickly than I did this one!**

 **Thanks for reading!**


	4. Chapter 4

"Stop being so impatient!" Izaya shouted from inside the bathroom, showing a rare display of an emotion other than sadistic amusement. His hand shot forward to quickly grab the bottle of hair gel on the counter and squirt some into his hand—hey, no one was naturally this attractive! He had to give his hair that perfect, slightly-spiky quality!

"Damn fucking flea, you're going to make us _both_ late!" Shizuo roared from the other side, hands grasping at the door in rage.

"You can leave; it's not like you make a fucking effort to look nice!" Izaya hissed, and he knew he sounded something like an angry, wet cat, but he couldn't much find it in himself to care when _where is the fucking eyeliner, it was just laying right there-_

With an angry howl from the other side, the bathroom door was ripped violently off of its hinges with a sickening _crack_ , flinging splinters of wood every which way. Izaya screamed and dropped the eyeliner he had just found, turning to stare in absolute shock _and_ fury at the angry Shizuo standing before him.

"I am _going to throw a fucking fridge at you_ if you don't _move the fuck over!"_ Shizuo snarled, his voice dripping venom and rage. Izaya cackled insanely, eyes alight with deranged fury and stress.

Spreading his arms out, Izaya screeched, "Oh, I'm ready for the _fucking_ fridge, Shizu-chan!"

Shizuo looked for a moment like he was going to literally rush out and rip the fridge from the kitchen to throw at Izaya, but then he took a deep, shuddering breath, and his shoulders sagged.

"Shove over, fucking flea," Shizuo growled, stomping into the bathroom and yanking his toothbrush from it's holder as if it had done something to personally offend him. Izaya panted, looking at and tracking Shizuo with suspicion. Why had he calmed down so suddenly?

Slowly, Izaya began to put the pieces together. Ohhhh. Shizuo was still under the threat of expulsion, so he probably didn't want to fight or ruin anything else. It was a wise choice, Izaya thought grudgingly. For himself as well, because if Shizuo broke anything else in the house, Izaya knew he'd be partially blamed for it whether it was actually his fault or not. So he held his tongue, but didn't bother to make room for Shizuo at the counter until the brute forcefully shoved him over.

Izaya watched Shizuo brush his teeth and wondered vaguely how all the enamel hadn't been stripped off, what with the violent way Shizuo was brushing.

It was then, in the midst of his staring, that Izaya realized how utterly _close_ he and Shizuo were. So close that their hips were touching even when they were both standing perfectly still, and if one of them reached to grab something-even just on their _own_ side of the counter-they would end up pressing their arm against the arm or stomach of the other person.

Hmm. These bathrooms sure were small.

And, of course, Izaya normally wouldn't have minded this closeness-especially with Shizuo, who, if given the chance, he wouldn't have really minded getting into the pants of either. As it was, though, this was all so horribly domestic that Izaya wanted to puke. So normal, getting ready next to someone in the morning.

Cringing to himself, Izaya quickly finished getting ready—which was very awkward, because he and Shizuo practically ignored each other for the whole time—and exited the bathroom. He heard Shizuo breathe a sigh of relief, which would have amused him had he not been so frustrated by the turn out of this morning. This would be an incredibly long year.

So, as he waited for Shizuo to finish up (what was taking the bastard so long, anyways? It's not like he cared about looks!), Izaya meandered about in the kitchen, making toast. It had been a while since he had had toast. It had been a while since he had had a normal breakfast, actually.

Look at him, contemplating his breakfast habits. How truly _boring._

"Shizu-chaaaan!" He called throughout the small apartment, waving his toast around absently. "If you don't stop primping soon, we're going to be even later than we already aaaaare!"

Predictably, Izaya was ignored, which made him wonder why in the world he was even waiting for Shizu-chan anyways. But, he kept waiting, and finished his toast, and in about five minutes, Shizuo was ready. Finally.

"It's your fault, flea," He grumbled when Izaya berated him for saying that _he,_ Izaya, was the one who took too long. "If we hadn't spent time fighting, I would've been done ten fuckin minutes ago."

"Of course you would've been, Shizu-chan," Izaya said, in that annoyingly cheeky voice of his. "Except that no, you wouldn't have been."

"Shut up."

Izaya merely laughing—which annoyed Shizuo to no end—and began skipping towards the door, pulling it open and holding it for Shizuo.

"After you, Princess," Izaya said, winking at him. Shizuo passed him by and shoved him into the wall before stepping outside. Ouch. That kind of hurt.

Izaya decided to get him back, because why not? He'd shoved and pushed Izaya one too many times today without repercussions, and that was going to end now.

So, as they entered the main street that led to the main campus, Izaya made his move. He sprang forward, hands outstretched, intending to shove Shizuo down quickly and in front of everyone—

Wait, what?

Izaya registered about .2 seconds before they collided that this was _not_ going as planned. Shizuo, sensing movement from behind him, had quickly whirled around, hands coming forward in order to stop Izaya as well. Unfortunately, however, Shizuo was too late, and he ended up basically enveloping Izaya in some kind of hug as they _both_ went crashing down.

Seriously, how much more cliché could this get?

"Fuck—" Shizuo swore, and Izaya felt shivers prickling down his spine, because Shizuo's mouth was basically _on his neck_ and _curse the gods for giving him a sensitive neck holy fuck._

Before focusing on anything else, however, Izaya did a quick assessment of his condition. No scrapes or bruises, it seemed; Shizuo had done a very good job of cushioning his fall. He did feel a little hot, though… Could you get a fever by falling? No, of course, you couldn't how stu—

 _Blushing._ Izaya fucking Orihara was _blushing._

 _What a terrible beginning to the day,_ Izaya thought, imagining how stupid he may look right now. He was _straddling_ Shizu-chan, though—this may be his body's normal reaction to physical contact like this after going so long without. Yes, that had to be it; Izaya paid no mind to the fact that he had never blushed when put into this situation with anyone else. His body was just starved for affection, and so it reacted to anything, even a beast such as Shizu-chan. That was all.

And then somebody wolf-whistled and shouted, "Oi! Get a room!" and Izaya could feel his face light up like a Christmas tree.

Well, Izaya reasoned, at least if he was like this, Shizuo was bound to be as well.

Suddenly, Izaya found himself being lifted up, and he let out a (MANLY) noise of surprise before being placed almost gently on the ground. Shizuo stood up, brushing his pants off, face tinged with red. Izaya scrambled up with as much dignity as he could muster and glared at everyone staring at them. They didn't _understand_ , dammit!

"Let's keep going," Shizuo muttered, shuffling forward with his hands in his pockets. He seemed far too embarrassed to be angry with Izaya at the moment; far too intent on getting them the fuck out of the situation to throw anything in Izaya's general direction.

Izaya hurriedly followed Shizuo, his playful and somewhat evil-looking smirk gone for the moment. _God,_ what a nightmare. Now everyone would think he and Shizuo were a _thing_ and Izaya would have to work around _that_ and his reputation would be _ruined—_

Oh, who was he kidding himself. He wasn't that upset about that. He was upset that for a moment—just a moment—he had really, _really_ enjoyed being that close to Shizuo. And it was scaring him. He was used to saying things playfully—was used to insinuated that he'd definitely fuck Shizuo if given the chance, but… _Actually_ doing that? Actually wanting it? Actually trying to _get_ it?

He was Izaya Orihara. He wasn't supposed to have to deal with things like that, with serious _want_ for anything… Much less a relationship with Shizuo Heiwajima.

 _Stupid,_ Izaya thought, smiling wryly. Please. He hated Shizuo. He'd fuck Shizuo, but he hated him. And he would _never_ actually _feel_ anything for the brute.

Please, Izaya repeated to himself.

Stupid idea.

 **A/N: I updated before the one month mark at least! Haha, sorry for the long space in between chapters, I was busy moving across the country! ...And then I just got kind of lazy. I had major writers block for a while, but I'm back now! I threw in some cliche Shizaya moments as an apology, so I hope it will suffice? Next chapter will be them going to classes together! Fun! Poor Izaya, struggling with new feelings...**

 **But yeah. Thanks for reading!**


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